D3 body, D1 cock
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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