I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
