just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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