What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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