I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Randomize
