i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
