Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
