and she was petting her beer can
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
