Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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