my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
my liver is dry heaving
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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