it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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