just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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