Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
