Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
