He is an equal opportunity slut.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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