but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
