so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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