He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
