Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
