if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
