I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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