I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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