The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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