you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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