what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
