Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
