why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
