summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize