love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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