sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
