it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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