Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
