I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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