you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
