I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize