It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
