Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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