They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
