i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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