I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
