dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Randomize
