A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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