Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
