Hey man sorry I got all grabby
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
