Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
