Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
