People with herpes should wear stickers.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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