She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
