Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
