everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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