we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
